Saturday, July 26, 2014

EMOTIONS

As of today, July 26th, 2014 I have a disease.

Please continue reading this post before you get the wrong impression.

On Friday the 25th, Madame Doroth kindly pointed out to me that on the 26th I would have a disease that will last a lifetime. And no, it’s not the kind of disease you are thinking of. Madame Doroth called it the disease of missing, and it’s actually a pretty rare thing here in Tanzania.

In Tanzania the cultural norm is to move on. Whether it’s lost loved ones or runaway dogs, here in Tanzania everyone is supposed to just move on. Regardless of how tragic the loss was, the people of Tanzania don’t show any emotion and continue to live their lives as if nothing ever happened.

But according to Madame Doroth, the same does NOT hold true for our loss. She told me, “You have all touched our hearts in a way that we will never forget. For every day we are not with you, we will miss you. Even though you are all over 1,000 miles away, please know every day we will miss all of you.” In a culture that frowns upon the grieving of lost loved ones, it was nothing but shocking to hear that they would feel that way.

With that being said, this was one of the hardest “goodbyes” I have ever experienced. It’s so incredibly hard to leave someone so important and meaningful in your life without a proper goodbye. I understand that sometimes things don’t go according to plan and a proper goodbye sometimes doesn’t happen. Friday was one of those things. Every goodbye was so chaotic and fast that it almost didn’t feel real. Due to a very tight schedule and just bad timing, we didn’t have time for a sorrowful and heartfelt goodbye.

Now that a good amount of time has passed and everything has somewhat slowed down, I have some time to think. I’m trying to figure out what all these different emotions are that are running through my head. But I can’t help but think this is for a reason. We don’t live in a perfect world; therefore, we can’t experience only positive emotions or perfect goodbyes. I guess what I’m trying to say is that the people that make you experience the most passionate emotions are the ones you truly care about. Even though I may struggle with these feelings, I’m grateful for these people and what they have brought into my life.



Wednesday, July 23, 2014

UNIQUE

Since day one at LOAMO we have been able to see first hand the astounding academic progression students have made. But today, I got to see first hand how much we have helped the teachers at LOAMO progress.

Today I initiated a conversation with Madame Flora in an attempt to learn a little more about her. I really wanted to know where she came from, if she was married, if she had kids, or brothers or sisters, etc. Madame Flora is the youngest of 3, her parents were happily married but her mother died giving birth to her. Both siblings went on to be farmers, but she took a different and unique path. Madame Flora decided to get enough money to go to the Arusha Teacher's College. She then landed a job as a teacher at LOAMO and has been teaching for 10 years. It was so inspiring to hear her tell that story of why she didn’t want to be an average farmer…. she wanted to be unique.

After hearing her story she started asking me questions. She was particularly interested in hearing how the teachers at LOAMO compared to the teachers in the States. She said, “I assume they are much better because they get paid 10 times more a month.” I then continued to tell her that she would be surprised because not every teacher in the States is a great teacher. Let’s face it, regardless of how much the teachers in the United States get paid, there are still some whose performance is below adequate. She nearly jumped out of her seat because she was so shocked. She then told me, “The other day while watching you teach fractions I realized something: I realized that no matter what your wage is, it’s still something. I don’t care if you are paid less than I am; if you are given a job you do it well, you do it an extraordinary way. Before you kids came here I would write down exercises on the board and just simply have the students copy and do them. We have done this every day until you showed up and taught in a different way. Watching you teach with creativity and enthusiasm was unique. I have never seen the students so excited to do fractions. So now when I plan a lesson I will be like you…. unique.”


Hearing this statement was one of the most empowering things I think I have ever heard. In that speech Madame Flora gave me a reward, a lesson, and inspiration. Not only will I leave the school of LOAMO knowing that I have made a difference that will help many kids for years to come, but also I will leave with the inspiration of a lifetime. I can’t express how determined I am to go home and get a job and not only do it well, but do it in an extraordinary way… I will continue to be unique.

Monday, July 21, 2014

AMEN

I don’t mean to step on anyone’s beliefs, but here we go….

Before coming on this trip, I always had a negative attitude towards organized religion. Every Sunday for 16 years, my parents would drag me to a church that I didn’t think was sacred. Then, I would proceed to pray to a god that I didn’t believe in, and now looking back, I’m nothing but appalled by how I acted. In a church that did nothing but accept me, all I did was reject it. I’m also appalled not only about how disrespectful I was, but also about how much faith I lacked as a person.

Before this trip, I always thought that, regardless of what you believe in, religion provides a person a place where they are welcome, and nothing more. I always thought church was a place for old people that had nothing to do on a Sunday morning. But it wasn’t until I got a rare opportunity to come to Tanzania and realize that religion has the ability to give a person the strength and other rare qualities that are bigger than man himself.

Speaking materialistically, the general population of Tanzania has remotely nothing. But speaking spiritually, they have everything. You can hear it in their voices when they sing the National Anthem, and you can see it in their hearts when they pray.


I’m not saying this trip has completely transformed me into a born-again, die-hard Christian, but one of the many things I’ve taken away from this trip is that believing in something can be empowering. For the longest time I have heard people say that, but it wasn’t until now that I realized it. As Paul (the Class II teacher) said to me before I left today, “Those who believe in something bigger than man will be able to achieve something bigger than man himself.”

Friday, July 18, 2014

SURVIVAL

In the states, and particularly at BMHS, participating in class can be the difference between a ‘C’ and an ‘A’. But here in Tanzania, participating in class could be the difference between life and death.

According to Mr. Thomas, the Class 7 mathematics and science teacher, “If you don’t speak in class, you will die.” Passing Class 7 in Tanzania is the equivalent to receiving a community college diploma in the States. Sure, it’s not much, but it is something.

It is truly mind-blowing how, even though we are living in the 21st century, it’s still survival of the fittest for the people in Tanzania. Except now, due to western influence, the definition of “survival of the fittest” has drastically changed. Thousands of years ago, humans living in Africa only needed the basic necessities to survive, and they would obtain those necessities accordingly. However, in today’s ever-changing world, people in Tanzania need an education to obtain those basic necessities.

I also talked to Mr. Kimaro about this particular topic. He told me that, “Regardless of what job you have, nothing is stable. Every day is a fight for survival.” Granted, Tanzania citizens aren’t literally fighting lions for food, but they sure are fighting.


Honestly, I can’t imagine waking up every day in survival mode. It scares me just thinking about it. But for the people of Tanzania this is yet another thing that doesn’t seem to affect their smiles or contagious laughs. Despite being in survival mode, the people of Tanzania see every day as an opportunity to succeed. It’s one thing to make the best out of a bad situation, but it’s another thing to make an opportunity out of a bad situation.

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

FISHING

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man how to fish and he’ll eat for a lifetime.

That is our ultimate goal on these trips: to teach self-sufficiency. However, it’s hard to teach a man how to fish when there isn’t any money for bait and a fishing pole.

Right now Mr. Kimaro is fishing with no fishing line, no bait, and no hook. In other words he is making the best out of what he has worked hard for, and what he has worked hard for isn’t a lot. Mr. Kimaro works from 7am-4pm Monday-Friday as a teacher at the LOAMO School in Arusha. Once school is out of session, Mr. Kimaro heads to the University of Dar Es Salaam in Arusha from 4pm-8pm, Monday-Friday.  He is getting a diploma certificate in computing & information technology in an attempt to get a job at a Secondary English School in Arusha. According to Mr. Kimaro, “My salary won’t save my life for a month. Therefore, I am forced to borrow, borrow, borrow, in order to support my family of five.” Sometimes borrowing isn’t even enough for Mr. Kimaro, as he also told me, “I must suffer a lot to make sure my family is fed 2 meals a day.”

Mr. Kimaro has every rare quality in a person that will result in success. However, he is missing one major resource that will prevent him from being successful: money.


I know this post is short. But after what I saw today, I am surprised I found any words at all to express what happened today. There are no words to express how I felt entering and leaving Mr. Kimaro’s house today.